Have your space by being who you are

When you give yourself the freedom to be exactly who you are, you have space.

When you allow yourself to take up space without having to explain yourself to anyone else, you have enough room to breathe and to be. You have the right to exist, and you know why you’re here.

You are here to learn who you are. This isn't anyone else's job, only you can do it. You have permission to make your own decisions without waiting for approval from anyone else, when you choose to be yourself. You do this by being who you are, and allowing others to be who they are.

One of the simplest ways to give yourself space is to not allow yourself to be squeezed into a self image that's too small for you.

Until you have a clear picture of yourself, and have boundaries that work for you, you’ll lose your space to demands from others. Some of these demands may come from those nearest and dearest to you, who want you to give up your space to them. They might not be conscious that they are making these demands, or they might not care.

Rather than take it personally or pick a fight, you can decide you are going to define yourself. Have your boundaries, not from a place of anger and resistance, but from a place of certainty and amusement. You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone, and it doesn’t have to make sense. Perfection is unnecessary, and will only get in the way.

Your space is always yours, unless you give it away to others.

It’s your job to define yourself. When you get in the habit of doing this, and of letting go of old self images you outgrew, you create healthy boundaries with others, and more space for you. The people who cannot have you being you, will fall away. When you consciously change into being more of yourself, some people will take offense. But why would you want to be around people who cannot have you being in your truth?

You can create a self image that allows you to have freedom to grow and change, and to feel how you want to feel, without having to hold yourself back for others who won't do this for themselves.

• ©Kris Cahill
  Image @Unsplash